Note: We are reissuing this story that first made headlines in December 2021.
Honoring individuals’ chosen names and pronouns is essential for respecting their identities. However, many still resist this practice, often due to outdated views or a blatant disregard for gender diversity.
Bennett Kaspar-Williams, 37, and their husband Malik welcomed their son Hudson in October 2020 through a cesarean section. At that time, Kaspar-Williams identified as male and used he/him pronouns, but now identifies as non-binary and uses both he/him and they/them pronouns. He encountered significant challenges in the hospital, as nurses frequently misgendered him, referring to him as a mother instead of a father, as reported by the Daily Mail.
Kaspar-Williams began his transition in 2014 after recognizing he was transgender in 2011. Although he underwent top surgery, he opted not to have lower body procedures. The journey of pregnancy and childbirth was both fulfilling and challenging for Kaspar-Williams. He felt particularly disheartened by the medical staff’s ongoing misgendering, which disregarded his gender identity.
Despite clearly indicating his gender on medical forms, the nursing staff continued to misgender him during their interactions. This experience underscored the persistent struggle for acknowledgment that childbirth and gender identity are not inherently connected.
Kaspar-Williams voiced his distress over being misgendered during childbirth, stressing the importance of distinguishing between womanhood and motherhood. He shared his frustrations with the New York Post, detailing the discomfort he experienced when referred to as “mom” despite marking “male” on medical documents.
“No one can truly know if having children is feasible until they attempt it — simply being born with a uterus does not guarantee conception or the ability to carry a pregnancy,” Kaspar-Williams stated. “This is why it’s crucial to stop defining ‘womanhood’ solely in terms of ‘motherhood,’ as it creates a misleading notion that all women can become mothers, that all mothers carry their children, or that all individuals who carry children are mothers.”
By choosing to begin his pregnancy journey while separating bodily functions from gender identity, Kaspar-Williams’ narrative highlights the intricacies of identity and the essential need to honor individuals’ self-identification.
Kaspar-Williams’ experience serves as a poignant reminder of the necessity for increased awareness and sensitivity within medical environments. As society progresses, our understanding and respect for gender diversity must also advance. By acknowledging people’s preferred pronouns and names, we take a meaningful step towards fostering a more inclusive and respectful world.
His journey through pregnancy and childbirth exemplifies the urgent need for change in how we view and address gender across various facets of life, particularly in critical areas such as healthcare. This narrative is not merely about one person’s experience but reflects the wider implications for how we treat and honor each other’s identities in all aspects of life.
Sources: Daily Mail
